Blue Peter Comes Alive!

by Blue Peter Schnitzel

/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.

      name your price

     

1.
(free) 01:14
2.
(free) 02:38
3.
(free) 01:57
4.
5.
(free) 01:03
6.
7.
8.
9.
(free) 01:55
10.
(free) 02:05
11.
(free) 01:40
12.
(free) 01:37
13.
(free) 01:38
14.
(free) 01:07
15.
16.
(free) 01:07
17.
(free) 01:10
18.
(free) 02:14
19.
(free) 02:13
20.
(free) 01:47
21.
(free) 01:25
22.
(free) 01:21
23.
(free) 02:45
24.
(free) 01:17
25.
(free) 01:58
26.
(free) 01:26
27.
(free) 01:48
28.
(free) 01:59

about

Self released album of eclectic pop songs about animals, food, clowns, Hello Kitty, and gnomes. Possibly the most popular record Blue Peter Schnitzel produced and the first album the band recorded using digital audio workstation technology which had only recently entered the home market in the late 90s.

Two tracks here omitted due to digital distribution restrictions: a dance mix of "Science Fiction Double Feature (reprise)" that was originally recorded for a Rocky Horror tribute CD on Center of the World Records and is no longer copyright cleared, and another track a guinea pig centric parody of the song "Rawhide" with lyrics by Carrie Carter which would likely fall under a fair use clause but is less certain.

credits

released January 25, 1998

All songs, arrangements, and mixing by Christopher Daniello, 1996-1998 Fierce Pancake Productions. Recorded using Cakewalk Pro Audio software on a Pentium 233 class workstation.

tags

license

all rights reserved

about

Blue Peter Schnitzel Houston, Texas

Blue Peter Schnitzel was the home recording project of Christopher Daniello circa 1992-2004, originally via self-released cassettes and CDs to about anyone who would take one from him. The band was stylistically reminiscent of They Might Be Giants, Jonathan Richman, The Magnetic Fields, The Chills, and The Judy's.

In 2007, Christopher formed The Grass Skirts, a hawaiian style ukulele combo.
... more

contact / help

Contact Blue Peter Schnitzel

Streaming and
Download help

Track Name: Corpse on a Bus
The lucky living corpse wakes up
feels the morning dew like corn
from a half eaten cob that fell on the floor
He brushes himself off and stops
being as stiff and as frigid
He scoops the dirt away and makes towards the bus
But the bus driver won't let him on board 'cause
Nobody wants to sit by him
Nobody wants to ride with a dead man
Nobody's your friend when you're missing your skin
The unlucky living corpse waits there
Patiently for several hours
And every time the same thing happens to him
No bus driver will let him on board 'cause
Nobody wants to sit by him
Nobody wants to ride with a dead man
Nobody's your friend when you're missing your skin
Track Name: Snake Farm
Went to the Snake Farm on I-35
Thought it might be fun to see them live
Shouldn't they be in cages?
Shouldn't they be in cages?
Beady eyes look'n at me like I'm a mouse
Something about this is making me nervous
Shouldn't they be in cages?
Shouldn't they be in cages?
Strike! Strike! Strike! Strike!
Strike! Strike! Strike! Strike!
Oh god I can't believe it got me
Hot venom, world is spinning, so dizzy
Why weren't they in cages?
Why weren't they in cages?
Strike! Strike! Strike! Strike!
Strike! Strike! Strike! Strike!
Track Name: Houdini
I made a jailbreak from Alcatraz
Broke out of Sing-Sing in five days flat
I could've shown Houdini a thing or two
So why can't I then escape from you?
Can't seem to sleep and been up for days
Tapping on the table in predictable ways
What did I do to deserve this agony?
You may or may not be dead but you're haunting me
Roses are red and your face was blue
Floating in the duck pond when I left you
I could've shown Houdini a thing or two
So why can't I escape from you?
Track Name: Garden Gnomes Liberation Front
You shouldn't be held captive
It's time to get proactive
Run gnomes go as you should
frolicking through the wood
we come tonight to free you
the front will liberate you
If you're happy in this prison
You don't know what you're missing
Lives lived ignorant see
nothing more than slavery
Can't meet your potential
Working against your nature
Say goodbye to the flowers
You've guarded these long hours
Garden duty's a crime
When you should be in the mines
we come tonight to free you
let us re-educate you
Track Name: Forgot How to Read
In my head somebody else is in my head somebody else in in my head
In my head somebody else is there
I went to bed thinking of myself and when I awoke it was just me too
But when I saw you I lost my mind buying a soft drink standing in line
and since then there is
In my head somebody else is in my head somebody else in in my head
in my head somebody else is there
I followed you to the library and hid behind the rack of magazines
then I forgot how to read and I picked up all the books that you set down
but can't tell what they're for
Track Name: The Candy Canes of Armageddon
10..9..8..7..6..
5...I saw the newscast and I can't believe my eyes
I saw you wink and smile
Tinsel rained down from the sky
4...what do we owe for this surprising holocaust?
The sleigh bells toll for us
Don't deck the halls because this world is through
Due to the candy canes and you
Are you going to be that way tonight?
3...so much in this world that I guess I'll never see
I understand you suddenly
Not helping to decorate the tree
2...is greater than the numbers that will persevere
To see the new year
Don't deck the halls because this world is through
Due to the candy canes and you
Are yougoing to be that way tonight?
1...0...
Track Name: I Live in a House of Gingerbread
I Live in a house made of gingerbread
The witch is gone I moved in instead
And I think that she's dead, well from what I've read
It might be sad but I'm not upset
The previous owner left quite a mess
There in the oven but I digress
The forest is nice this time of year
The pixies are friendly so are the reindeer
And they nibble on my lawn but I don't mind
Because I am kind and I share my find
If I get bored and I'm feeling down
I'll follow the bread crumbs back into town
I live in a House of gingerbread I do
Track Name: Mad Swooping Clown Heads
I'm being followed and I don't dare turn around
I hear the laughing coming out of painted frowns
I feel trapped and three times encircled
And the mad swooping clown heads laugh
And nibble at my ears
And wait for blood to go cold
Like comic vultures
Disembodied yet still embodying their vaudeville evil
Clown heads descending like a burning jumbo jet
They're falling faster and without a safety net
This must be the greatest fear on Earth
And the mad swooping clown heads laugh
Grinning like maniacs
And they're clinging to my body
Please get them off me
Disembodied yet still embodying their vaudeville evil
Track Name: Wooden Peg
Tell me the story how you lost your leg
I'm fascinated by your wooden peg
I want to know if you gave it a name
Do you still harbor resentment and shame?
Was it adventure upon the high seas?
Or was it a horrifying disease?
Were you in a bad automobile crash?
Or did you gamble it once out of cash?
Whatever I really must know
Or I won't be able to sleep tonight
I must say on you it looks good
But I hope it don't happen to me
But let's not talk about me...
Tell me what tragic events on you fell
I want to know every gorey detail
Did you forfeit it in some creature's claws?
Or did you gnaw it off with your own jaws?
Track Name: New Wave Love
I really love the way you dance, like you're slowly jogging in place
I really dig your parachute pants and the blue makeup on your face
I wish that I had hair like you, a trendy nest of rainbow spikes
I want to go to the places you do and see the new wave bands you like
Track Name: My Cunning Plan
Soon I'll rule the world, so don't you laugh at me
I've a cunning plan that I'll hatch evily
Make me mad and I'll throw a fit
Once I rule the world I'll kick you off of it
I've got mind control and I've got rocket ships
You've made fun of me since I was just a kid
So it's time for revolution
Fools, I'll destroy you all! Don't think it won't be fun.
Track Name: Feed the Whales
Feed the Whales
The whales are hungry
Track Name: Peter the Saint
I can see Peter the Saint now I'm at Heaven's Gate
I hope I don't have to wait I think I've earned this fate
Peter looks bored as we shuffle by
and takes one off his stack of Ding Dongs
I would not have pictured this while I was still alive
yo yo yo yo...
Truth is I was mostly good I had no thoughts impure
I did everything I could to refuse temptation's lure
Now I'm in line and I can see my harp all decked in gold and my halo
Peter grabs a cake and flings the wrapper to Uriel
yo yo yo yo...
He takes a bite and creamy white goo dribbles down his chin
On the book directly right where my name should have been
"Sorry kid but you ain't listed, so down the chute you go,
thank's for playing"
I can see Peter waving goodbye goodbye
yo yo yo yo...
Track Name: A Rocking Buffet
Went out for eat, to the buffet
I had some turkey with creamy gravy
I had some salad I filled two bowls
With mashed potatoes and rocking dinner rolls
Then I sat down and I ate everything on my plate
Went back to the bar while I was able
The waitress started dancing on the table
I got some carrots I got some boar
I stopped a moment to backspin on the floor
Then I saw down and I ate everything on my plate
Don't think I've ever, ever been this full before
Don't think I've ever, never been this full before
Then I went back and got some more
Track Name: America's Best Loved Mattress
Well I knew I'd have to buy me a new bed
When I couldn't get rid of the bed bugs
All the ads said the best mattress to buy was on sale
So I went to the mall
In the store I tested it out myself
It was soft yet firm make no mistake
Oh America's most best loved mattress was on sale
And it repels bed bugs
Track Name: Not Without My Chair
Time and space could fight, time would win if it was tonight
I think that you're here, I've forgotten that you went
And I've forgotten why
I'm not going anywhere
give me back my hair, hold it high so I can't reach but
I'm not going anywhere
till I get it back
Sitting in the lurch
Couldn't stand another day
Since you went away
I've been talking to the chair, where you used to sit
I'm not going anywhere
not without my chair, hold it high so I can't reach but
I'm not going anywhere
not till I get it back
Track Name: Googly Eyes
I feel so dank inside, warm yet moist
When you stare at me when you stare at me
With your googly eyes
Tell you 'bout a dream I had
Hello Kitty was my Mom
And Kerroppi was my Dad
And at night they sang this song
to me rocking my cradle
la la la la la la...
We feel so dank inside, warm yet moist
When you stare at us when you stare at us
With your googly eyes
Track Name: Fearsome Yeti
Fearsome Yeti, where you have gone?
You've left some tracks here in the snow - so where do they go?
If I follow them will I find an...abominable snowman
I'll follow them...I'll follow them
Fearsome Yeti I will find thee
And take a picture for all to see - they have to believe me
Won't they believe? They will when they see the Abominable Snowman
So here I come, ready or not!
I understand why you hide from man and all of his wicked ways
They'd just want to use you, poke prod and abuse you
You'd be a star a curiosity always in the public eye
And so you shirk from fame and in your place I might do the same
Fearsome Yeti, I'm not afraid
I can wait for you all day adn the next day too
I will find you and I will expose the Abominable Snowman
Track Name: People in the Mail
I know some people who live in the mail
some of them are even 1st class
houses fashioned from crates
most of them get bulk rates
travelling all around the world
Jeremy doesn't stay long in one place
Must spend a fortune on stamps
Rather than send a post card
deliver himself to your yard
post marks from all around the world
Jenny said she'd be here this holiday
I suspect they lost her on the way
Maybe she fell from a truck
Or if she had worse luck
Maybe she fell out of a plane
Track Name: Pretender Mambo
Coffee in a styrofoam cup, stirred in too much sugar
Now it's making fun of me and my fantasy
Dreaming that I knew how to dance
Not just a pretender, a real go getter
Guess I made a real fool of myself when I took to the floor
Jerked around like I had my head on backwards
And the girls all stopped and stared at me in disbelief
And mortal fear
Fear for their lives if we should collide
Plate of macaroni and cheese singing to me softly
"My oh my it sure looks like you blew it this time"
Crying in a styrofoam cup
Not forever a pretender
I will get better
One of these days
Track Name: Big Dogs on My Face
Got big dogs on my face
I just can't get 'em off
Wrong time and wrong place
I ain't the lucky one
Strangest thing not even my fortune cookie fortold
My bones are sticking out
I just can't put 'em back
Dogs want to chew, no doubt
I ain't the lucky one
Strangest thing not even my tarot reader forsaw
Strangest thing not even my palm reader forsaw
Big dogs on my face
Please lend me a hand
My own they left no trace
I ain't the lucky one
Got Big dogs on my face
Get 'em offa me
Got Big dogs on my face
Get 'em offa me
Track Name: Arms & Ambulance
There's an ambulence outside of the city cafeteria
and the EMS is carrying out a stretcher
And I see flashing lights and I hear sirens so I know that
Somebody is dying, somebody is dying,
somebody is dying and I hope that it's you
There's been animosity between us since before the war
when you stole the arms off of the Venus de Milo
Once you're off your guard I can reunite the arms once more
Somebody is dying, somebody is dying,
somebody is dying and I hope that it's you
So I see flashing lights and I hear sirens so I pray that
Somebody is dying, somebody is dying,
somebody is dying and that somebody is you
Track Name: Icepick
Got this thing when the ice machine stopped working right
Never used it much, never thought I would
Lunged at her with it as she picked yet another fight
Can't believe I was so uncontrollable
Too late now to bore through me with those piercing eyes
The metaphorical, already physical
Didn't start this row but I must look like the bad guy
Till she weakens so, from the loss of blood
Track Name: Puppet
You could say I'm just a puppet
And you've been pulling my strings
I jump and dance at your whimsy
I do all sorts of odd things
And when you're done in the corner I will slump
Till you need me
I wasn't always in bondage
I once had my own free will
Guess I thought though that I liked it
Guess I think that I must still
And when you're done in the corner I will slump
Till you next need me
You seem to me like you're so cold
And seem so misunderstood
You play with me with disinterest
The fireplace needs some wood
And when you're done in the fire I will go
If you need me
Track Name: Explorer's Club
I used to travel in the Explorer's Club
and I have pictures, enough to back me up when I say
I've been all around the world and seen some grisly sights
like the time a fearsome yeti ate my Himalayan guide
I've been all around the world and it doesn't get much better
Why did I leave you all this time, what could we have done together?
At least I could have taken you along
I once was freezing somewhere near the South Pole
I'd fallen in a hole bored by a hot-headed mole
I really could have used some of your hot tea
lucky a crew of penguins took pity and rescued me
I've been all around the world and it doesn't get much better
Why did I leave you all this time, what could we have done together?
At least I could have taken you along
In deep dark Africa the animals parade
I met a lemon rhino in a lemon glade
He said, "I see that you have been 'round this wide world
But what on earth were you thinking the day you left behind your girl?"
I've been all around the world and it doesn't get much better
Why did I leave you all this time, what could we have done together?
At least I could have taken you along
But I did not
Track Name: Space Invaders
So they came, big surprise, flying saucers fill the skies
Fireballs and laser beams, hear the burning cattle scream
Space Invaders, Space Invaders, come on down
Our time is nigh, these guys mean business
we're all gonna fry we're all gonna fry
Marching single file and they're knocking on the doors
and humming songs in funny keys
and marching knocking down the doors and humming
Bug eyed men, please don't be mean, we all think you're really keen
now we face the big disgrace, they'll replace us with their race
Space Invaders, Space Invaders, come on down
Track Name: Housefly
I am a house fly
abducted into the sky
don't believe anybody
who says in space life don't exist
I never asked to be out of this world
but I'm interesting to them
They fly a saucer
they came from the horse head nebula
don't believe anybody
who says they're green it isn't true
I was content on this rock for so long
now they say I must go with them
I am a house fly
abducted into the sky
don't believe anybody
who thinks they'll come and be our friends
I miss that dog and my old window sill
Though the new view is much better
Track Name: Blue Balloon
Wish I may wish to the moon, on a fish shaped blue balloon
May this letter reach to you, I've seen meerkats in the zoo
Meerkats in the zoo do sun, under heat lamps one by one
As I watched it came to me, we haven't spoke since '93
Can you recall where we left off? I'd been struck with whooping cough
Sick in bed, sick in my room, you sent card with blue balloon
Fish shaped hallmark blue balloon, crayon scrawl said "get well soon"
Now I have and look for you, but you don't still work at the zoo
la la la de dah de do, la la la de dah de do...
All that I want you to know, My life seems to decay slowly,
Half of what I've stored away, is useless to me today
Many memories of you, feeding lions in the zoo
I can hear you toss them meat, and in my head it still sounds sweet
la la la de dah de do, la la la de dah de do...
Today I wore my hunter's vest, climbed that tree and stole a nest
Baby bluebirds in their eggs, cracked them open on my legs
Saw the young chicks slide on down, licked their remains off the ground
It tasted like when I kissed you, kind of wet and pungent too
la la la de dah de do, la la la de dah de do...